Throughout the past 17 years of my life, I realized how much I adore babies and children. I was completely set on the idea of having six kids and being a stay at home mom who loved on her babies and cleaned all day. After having Jayce, it seems like that’s changed, It’s not because I’m so young, or financially unable. Although those are both true. It’s not because I can’t handle that many children. It’s simply because Jayce has hold of my entire heart. There’s nobody in the world that I have loved as deeply as I love Jayce. I’m scared that my next child won’t have as much of my love and attention as the sweet boy cuddled into my arms has. I’m scared that somehow Jayce will come first, before any, even his brothers and sisters. This might just me being overly worried because when I was pregnant, I never knew just how much I would love my baby or how honored being his mom would make me. My eyes are as open as they’ve ever been to how much people’s children mean to them. It also has made me become aware of how ridiculous someone must be if ANYTHING comes before the sweet human they’ve created.